


A Christmas Caper

by QueenofDuctTape



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, F/M, Matchmaking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-15 17:42:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13036182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenofDuctTape/pseuds/QueenofDuctTape
Summary: At the Ministry's annual Christmas party, Draco finds his stocking is missing from the decorations. Convinced Harry stole it, he ropes Hermione and Astoria into a plan to steal it back.





	A Christmas Caper

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [DFFandCabalChristmasFest](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/DFFandCabalChristmasFest) collection. 



> Written for the Dramione Fanfiction Forum and Slytherin Cabal "Make My Wish Come True" Fest, 2017. Hope you enjoy!

**December 20, 2004**

 

"Ready for the party?" Hermione heard her husband call through the open door to the bedroom. She glanced at the clock; she was running late! 

 

"Just a second!" Hermione called back as she hopped around the room in one shoe, trying to put in her earrings while simultaneously looking for the second shoe.

 

"We've got time," Draco told her, entering the room. He leaned against the wall, relaxed. His grey eyes were bright as he watched her hop around the room, clearly amused. Hermione shot him a glare. Finally she had both her shoes on as well as both her earrings in. She smiled brightly at Draco, the only hint that she had been a mess just a few minutes earlier was her flushed cheeks. He pushed away from the wall and offered his arm to her, leading the way to the Floo and the Ministry's Annual Christmas Party.

 

When they arrived there was quite a crowd in the Atrium as all of the employees of the Ministry of Magic attempted to funnel into the banquet hall.

 

"I've never understood why we have to do one big event for the whole Ministry," Draco complained, much more loudly than Hermione would have liked. "Why can't we just do it by Department?" Hermione shushed him.  She was craning her neck to search for anyone they knew, while keeping a tight hold on Draco's arm. She had learned early on in their marriage that he was prone to wandering off if she didn't keep a sharp eye -- or hand -- on him.

 

"Look, there's Ernie and Susan," she said, pointing to their old Hogwarts year-mates and now coworkers. "Let's go wait with them." She dragged Draco in their direction and they made polite conversation while waiting to get into the ballroom. Hermione was genuinely interested in learning about the Macmillans' youngest child, born three months prior, while Draco's enthusiasm bordered on the sarcastic. Fortunately, Ernie and Susan themselves were too excited to notice this, and the half hour or so that they stood in line passed quickly.

 

When they finally made it into the banquet hall, Hermione immediately noticed the decorations and squealed in delight. "Look, Draco, they've got stockings!"

 

This was a massive understatement. All four of the large ballroom walls were covered eight feet high with stockings. She smiled at Draco, watching the thoughts flit across his face. He literally swallowed a comment, and Hermione smirked to herself. Perhaps it was mean to goad Draco, but he was so unused to holding his tongue that it was always fun to watch him bite back remarks. Hermione did like the stockings, but from the look on Draco's face he probably thought the sheer number of them was tacky. Finally, he said, "It looks like there must be one for every Ministry employee."

 

Hermione beamed at him. "You're right!" she exclaimed. "Let's go find ours." She dragged him over to the section for the Department of the Control of Magical Creatures and began hunting for her name. She found it pretty quickly, since the stockings were arranged in alphabetical order, but she did have to squint to read it.

 

"The text on mine is very small," she commented to Draco, a bit disappointed.

 

"Well, your name is very long," he said practically. "Hermione Jean Granger-Malfoy is much harder to fit on a stocking than..." his eyes roamed the wall. "Anne Smith," he pointed out.

 

Hermione pouted. "They could have given me a bigger stocking instead of using smaller letters," she said.

 

Draco flashed her his trademark smirk. "Don't be greedy," he admonished, giving her a quick kiss. "Now, let's go find mine!" He set off in the direction of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement.

 

Draco's department was much larger than Hermione's, so it took them longer to track down his name... When Hermione found it she gasped. Instead of a stocking, there was an empty space between Neville Longbottom and Nancy McCormack. She tried to move to stand in front of it before Draco could see, but it was too late.

 

"Where's my stocking?" he asked, sounding much more upset than someone who didn't like the stockings in the first place really ought to be.

 

"I'm sure it's around, Draco. We'll just have a look and see if it fell off the wall or something," Hermione told him.

 

"I'm sure they're stuck on with sticking charms. There's no way any of them could have fallen off early." He tugged on Neville's stocking to demonstrate that it wouldn't budge.

 

"Well, then we'll just have to find someone who was decorating and ask them where it might have gone," she said soothingly. Draco's gaze jerked abruptly to hers.

 

"Potter!" he growled.

 

"What?" asked Hermione, utterly confused. Harry's stocking was there; she could see it just down the wall.

 

"Potter was the one sent from our department to decorate for the party!" Draco exclaimed. "He must have stolen it on purpose!"

 

"Draco, calm down," Hermione told him, glancing around to make sure no one was noticing his outburst. "If Harry took your stocking, it was probably just for a bit of a laugh; we'll just go ask him--"

 

" _A bit of a laugh?_ " asked Draco, his voice much higher than usual.

 

"Let's just go talk to Harry," Hermione began again soothingly.

 

"No!" Draco exclaimed. "We will not be talking to Potter!" he said decisively.

 

"Even if he doesn't have your stocking, I'm sure he'd know--" Hermione tried again to make Draco see reason, but he was having none of it.

 

"No!" he said again, louder. Now people were beginning to notice. Hermione smiled weakly at them and tried to wave them off. _No big deal, no big deal_ , she thought frantically in their direction, almost wishing she had the ability to put thoughts in their heads, despite the massive invasion of privacy that power would be. Really, legillimancy was bad enough, she thought, then realized Draco was speaking again. It sounded like he was outlining some kind of plan of attack.

 

"We just need  a distraction," he was saying, looking around thoughtfully. Hermione had a sinking feeling that she had missed something important and was going to regret it later. Soon Draco had found whatever it was he was looking for, and it was his turn to grab Hermione's arm and pull her through the crowd.

 

____________________

 

“Astoria!” Draco called. Hermione peered around him and saw that they were headed for the small woman. She thought wistfully, as she always did when she saw Astoria, that it was unfair how effortlessly perfect she looked. Astoria had beautiful silky dark hair that curled gently and never frizzed like Hermione's. Her delicate, doll-like features lit up when she turned and saw them heading towards her, revealing small perfect teeth that she had never had charmed to be straighter or whiter (Hermione knew because she had asked). Hermione found herself smiling in return. When she'd first met Astoria she had wanted to hate her for being so perfect and such a close friend to her then-boyfriend. But Astoria was so unfailingly kind that she had become Hermione's favorite of Draco's old school friends (the few of whom he had kept in contact with anyway).

 

“Draco, how lovely to see you here!” Astoria greeted him by clasping his hands in both of hers and lightly kissing the air next to both of his cheeks. “And Hermione, how are you?” She gave Hermione a less formal hug.

 

“I'm doing well, thank you,” Hermione said. “I didn't know you were working for the Ministry, Astoria. Or are you here with someone?” Hermione winked at her, and Astoria laughed.

 

“No,” she said. “Actually I recently started a position in the DMLE with --”

 

Draco cut her off. “You'll have to tell us all about it later, Astoria, we're in a bit of a hurry now.”

 

“Oh is something wrong?” she asked.

 

“Potter has stolen my Christmas stocking, and we need to steal it back immediately,” Draco announced.

 

“Harry Potter?” Astoria asked. “He stole your Christmas stocking?” She looked questioningly at Hermione, who shrugged. “Well of course I'll be happy to help, Draco. But I don’t know why you would need me to go with you to talk to Harry.”

 

Draco rolled his eyes. “I don’t want you to come with me to talk to Potter, I want you to go talk to Potter and distract him while Hermione and I go and search for my stocking.”

 

“I really think we should just talk to Harry,” Hermione said but was hard to understand, because Astoria was speaking at the same time.

 

“I don’t think I know Harry that well,” Astoria began, then waited for Hermione to finish speaking before she continued, a little desperately. “Shouldn’t you really have one of his friends distract him?” She gestured at Hermione.

 

Draco shook his head. “Hermione is a terrible spy,” he said. “Potter would know something was up three seconds after she started talking to him.”

 

Hermione thought about making a token protest at this assessment of her character, but knew he was right. She could never fool Harry.

 

“I still don’t think--” Astoria started, but Draco interrupted her.

 

“I need someone to distract Potter who will charm him,” he said in what Hermione recognized as his own most charming voice. “I’ll just take you over to Potter now--”

 

“Now?” It was Astoria’s turn to interrupt.

 

“Now,” Draco repeated firmly. “And you can chat with him, maybe dance and have dinner together if he’s lucky.” Hermione had to hold in a snort. Draco was really laying it on thick now, thought Astoria still looked doubtful. She decided it was time for a different tactic, if she ever wanted to get done with Draco’s silly little mission and actually enjoy the party with her husband.

 

“It won’t take very long,” she told Astoria. “Harry has always been crap at hiding things. We probably won’t even have to look. We’ll just go the storage room, perform a quick _Accio_ , and be back before you’re done reminding Harry that you were introduced at our wedding.”

 

“Just a few minutes?” Astoria asked. Hermione nodded. “Alright then,” she acquiesced.

 

Draco squeezed Hermione’s hand in thanks. “I’ll go drop Astoria off with Potter, meet by the storage room door?” Hermione nodded, and they parted ways.

 

____________________

 

Astoria wasn’t sure how she had gotten roped into this, but suddenly she found herself face-to-face with _the_ Harry Potter. Draco had already abandoned her, and Harry was looking at her expectantly.

 

“I’m sorry,” she began. “You probably don’t even remember me, I’m --”

 

“Astoria Greengrass,” Harry finished for her. “We met at their wedding.” He nodded in the direction Draco had left, but his eyes stayed on hers.

 

“Er, yes,” she said. Awkwardly. She had never felt so awkward in her life. His eyes were so green, and his gaze was so intense he seemed to see straight through to her soul.

 

“Draco said you’re here by yourself?” he asked.   


“What?” she said. “Oh, yes! Um, I just started working in the DMLE. I don’t really know anyone yet, but I got invite to the party. So… here I am,” she finished lamely.

 

Harry guided her to a refreshments table. “Punch?” he asked, and began filling two glasses when she nodded. “I think you probably know that I work for the DMLE too,” he said, and she laughed.

 

“I think everyone knows that Harry Potter is an Auror,” she teased.

 

“So why haven’t I seen you around then?” he asked.

 

“Oh, I’m in the judicial branch. I haven’t worked with any Aurors yet.”

 

He asked a few more questions about her work, seeming genuinely interested in it, and then they were done with their punch. Harry politely took her empty glass from her and disposed of both of theirs in a nearby trash can.

 

“Well, it was nice to talk to you, Astoria,” he said, glancing at some people who were clearly making their way to him. “I hope we’ll run into to each other work sometimes.”

 

Astoria could take a hint. She hadn’t seen Draco or Hermione come back into the ballroom, but the people heading towards Harry looked important. The Malfoys probably wouldn’t get caught, and even if he did catch them, how could they expect her to monopolize the time of a famous war hero? “Me too,” she said in response to his comment about work. “I’ll leave you to your friends,” she said, bobbing a small curtsy to him, and turned to leave.

 

Harry grabbed her hand to stop her before she could go. “Wait,” he said. She raised her eyebrows at him. “I don’t want to talk to them,” he admitted.

 

“But they’re important! At least two of them are on the Wizengamot,” she protested.

 

“Please don’t leave me alone with them,” he begged. “They want to talk to me about moving up in the Ministry. Going into politics. I like my job the way it is, and I’m running out of nice ways to say no. Please, Astoria.” His eyes were boring into her again.

 

“Let’s dance,” she said impulsively.

 

“What?” he said.

 

“Let’s dance,” she repeated, gesturing to the dance floor in the middle of the ballroom. It wasn’t crowded, and it didn’t look too formal. Most of the couples were just swaying to whatever tune was playing.

 

“I don’t know how to dance,” Harry protested, which only made Astoria want to make him do it even more.

 

“They don’t either,” she said of the couples already out there, beginning to pull him in that direction. He didn’t resist, and she knew she had won. “Besides, your Wizengamot friends can’t interrupt you on the dance floor. You could avoid them as long as you want.”

_____________________

 

Retrieving Draco’s stocking wasn’t a simple matter of performing a summoning charm. Hermione and Draco both tried _Accio_ and a few other more complex summoning charms, but with no result. Draco insisted on doing a physical search of the room. Hermione tried to protest. She seriously doubted it was in there. Harry was a good wizard, and a skilled Auror, but he wouldn’t have warded a Christmas stocking, stolen as a joke, with so many anti-theft charms.

 

“Draco, I really don’t think Harry would have warded your stocking so well,” Hermione said for what had to be the fifth time.

 

Draco shook his head. “You don’t work with him, Hermione. Those spells are second nature to Aurors. He wouldn’t have even thought not to bother with them. You can either help me look, or go stand watch by the door.”

 

Hermione eyed the shelves Draco was now climbing with distaste, then looked down at her dress, which was quite fitted and decidedly unsuited for climbing anything, let alone rickety stairs. “I’ll stand watch,” she said.

 

“Send a warning if anyone comes in,” Draco told her.

 

“Alright,” she said, aiming a cushioning charm at the floor as he climbed up another shelf. Just in case.

 

An hour later, Hermione was getting bored standing by the door. And hungry.

 

“Draco?” she called.

 

“Over here!” his voice was faint. Hermione walked towards him, and nearly had a heart attack when she found him. He was on the last shelf in the back of the room, nearly twenty feet above the ground. She sent another, stronger, cushioning charm at the floor and crossed her fingers in the hopes he wouldn’t fall.

 

“Draco, let’s go get something to eat, I’m hungry,” she told him.

 

“Yeah, alright,” he replied dejectedly. I don’t think it’s in here anyway. This was my last shelf to search.”

 

“Then get down from there before you fall,” she ordered. He shot her a wicked grin and climbed down quickly, reaching the floor in less than a minute.

 

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, squeezing the breath from her lungs. “Did I scare you, wife?” he all but purred in her ears.

 

“Of course not,” she said breathlessly. He released her and winked, taking her hand to lead the way out of the storage room. They passed under a light and she got a good look at his clothes. “The only scary part of this is how dusty you are!” she exclaimed. His formerly black suit was now almost light gray.

 

She pulled out her wand and pointed it at his suit. He yelped. “What are you doing?” he asked, eyeing her wand with reproach.

 

“Just a _Scourgify_. It won’t totally clean you up, but at least the dust won’t be so obvious to everyone at the party.”

 

“No!” Draco shouted. “You can’t Scourgify this suit, it’ll ruin the fabric!” He began frantically sweeping off the dust with his hands, but it didn’t help.

 

Hermione scoffed at him. “Don’t be ridiculous. Your search and all that dust has already ruined the suit.”

 

Draco scowled but let her perform the spell. “Let’s break for dinner, reconvene with Astoria, and then make sure she keeps Potter occupied, because next we should check in his office.”

 

Hermione groaned.

_____________________

 

When they reached the ballroom again, they spotted Astoria and Harry still dancing. Draco nodded in approval. “Let’s split up,” he suggested to Hermione.

 

“What?” she asked.

 

He nodded towards the dance floor. “Potter’s occupied for now, but who knows how long that will last. Let’s split up. I’ll get food and you can get us some drinks, then we’ll have dinner in half the time.

 

"What can I get you?" the bartender asked as Hermione approached.

 

"Two brandies," she said. The man obligingly set two glasses in front of her. Hermione pointed first at one and then the other of them. "A little brandy in here, and a lot of brandy in there," she told him.

 

The bartender chuckled and poured a much larger portion in the second glass. "That kind of night?" he asked as she took a gulp from the second glass.

 

"You have no idea," she said fervently, and left carrying the two brandies, now of equal portions.

 

By the time she returned to Draco with their drinks, he had already scarfed down his plate of food.

 

“Hurry up with yours,” he ordered imperiously. “I don’t see Potter or Astoria, so I’m worried we won’t have much time in his office.”

 

“I don’t know why you think Harry needs distracting,” Hermione argued. “Why would he be doing work during the Christmas party?”

 

Draco rolled his eyes, “Please, Hermione, he’s almost as bad of a workaholic as you are. And I know the only reason you’re not running off your office is because you’ve already taken all of your pressing work back to our home office.”

 

“I promised to take the week between the Christmas and New Year’s off,” Hermione protested. “So I have to do some work at home to get ahead before I take the time off and get behind.” She could tell Draco wanted to say something in reply to that but was holding it back. He was really getting quite good at restraining himself these days.

 

“Just eat your dinner,” Draco finally said, sipping his brandy.

 

The second Hermione put the last bite of her dinner in her mouth, Draco dragged her up and rushed for the lifts. Hermione had to chew as they ran and nearly choked on her food.

 

“What’s the rush?” she asked.

 

“Potter disappeared from the ballroom,” he told her. “So did Astoria, so it’s possible they went somewhere together, but I know he’ll end up back in his office sooner or later.”

 

Once the lift stopped at the Auror’s offices, Draco led the way through the eerily deserted cubicles. Hermione had visited her husband’s office several times, but it was always bustling with people. It was so weird to see it completely empty.

 

Draco had been rushing, but when they approached the office area, he slowed abruptly.

 

“What is it?” Hermione asked curiously.

 

“Shh!” Draco hissed at her. “The lights are on,” he whispered. “I think he might be in there already.”

 

They crept closer and peered in the door. Harry was there already -- and so was Astoria. She was sitting on Harry’s desk, and he was kissing her so deeply that Hermione blushed and looked away. Draco quietly shut Harry’s office door behind them.

 

“Sorry we were too late,” she whispered to him as they tip-toed away from the office.

 

“It’s fine,” he said, and she turned to look at him, confused. Draco was smirking at her, holding up a stocking, the words _Draco Malfoy_ stitched neatly onto the white trim.

 

“Wha-- what?” Hermione spluttered. “When did you find that?” she finally asked.

 

“Today at work,” he replied nonchalantly.

 

“ _What?_ ”

 

“Potter wanted a chance to get to know Astoria better,” Draco explained, that damned smirk still gracing his features. “So he asked me for help since they’re never in the same place at the same time.”

 

Hermione was starting to see how her idiot best friend and meddling husband might concoct this wild plan, but part of it still didn’t make sense. “So why did you lead me on a wild goose chase all evening?” she huffed.

 

Draco’s smirk widened to a real smile, and he winked. “Because it’s so rare that I get to pull one over on you anymore, Granger,” he said, putting an arm around her shoulders as they strolled back out of the Auror’s offices. “Back to the party?” he asked.

 

“No…” she said thoughtfully. “Let’s just go home. I’m sure I can find some way to punish you.” She winked and set off for the Floos at a run. Draco chased after her, laughing all the way.


End file.
